I really like this time of year. Sleighbells ringing, snow is falling and you better watch out you better not cry. Yes its Christmas and tis the season to be jolly. Everyone is generally in a bit of a better mood. Whether they are addled by the party season or goodwill to all men is debatable. But everyone likes Christmas. Including grumpy old J.H.
And one of the reasons I love Christmas is because its near the end of the year. And every magazine, newspaper, television show and soapbox pontificator does a review of the best and worst of the year. And in the tradition of such I want to do mine.
You can, however, relax. I’m not going to do a best of movies or music or cups of coffee that I’ve sampled. I’m going to a top ten things of all things John Holohan in 2009. (That might include some movies or music but only in a good way).
So here it is. In no particular order. Jay Haitch’s 2009 in review. If you read it and you like it, maybe you’ll do your own.
10:Therapy
This time last year I was a wreck. My blood pressure was of the charts. I was constantly having headaches. I was stressed out by work. I was depressed. I went to my G.P. and she recommended some counselling sessions. I’m not sure of your take on counselling but here was mine. Is there a stigma? Surely its just for neurotic Americans? Do I really need it? What will I get from it?
The answer to these questions are; the stigma is only in your head. I was amazed how good and supportive my friends were. I did choose to only tell my closest friends (til now) and as far as anyone else having a problem or a preconception with it…I guess its like every other prejudice. Who really gives a shit what small minded people think.
No its not just for Woody Allen types. There isn’t a single person in the world who wouldn’t benefit from it at one stage in their life. Anyone who says this isn’t true…well…they need therapy .
Yes I needed it. The stress I was feeling with work was born out of my frustration with many other aspects of my life. My Family, my love life, work, moving house 7 times in 8 years and a general sense of arrrgggghhh all led to my feelings of frustration, anger, helplessness, self-loathing (that might be a bit strong…but I definitely didn’t like myself.)
What I got from it was a bit of understanding. An ability to stand up and take responsibility for how my life goes. For the most part I control what I take from the great journey that is existence. I now see how I can deal with any problems that come up and there is no need for me to let it all build up and there is no need to fear anything. Life happens. I can cope.
I’ve been seeing my counsellor Adeela since January. Initially weekly, then fortnightly and then Monthly. This Saturday I will have my last scheduled session with her. Does that mean I’m ‘sane again? I’m not sure I was ever really ‘crazy’ but whatever it means, it’s a good feeling.
9:Driving
One of the first things I got out of counselling was Adeela challenged me to complete something. Start something and see it through to the end. As it happened, I had just bought Lisa’s car ‘Doreen’ and was planning to learn to drive. So I did.
Initially it was the single most traumatic experience I have ever had. Bumps and scrapes were bountiful and the sound of other drivers horns is something I still hear sometimes in the darkness. But I persevered. It is an incredibly liberating thing and I love the fact that I can do it. Even if I am 33 and most people learn when they are 15. Don’t burst my bubble man.
8: Movies
I’ve been without full time work for the last couple of months. So I’ve been taking full advantage of my Cineworld Multipass. For €19.99 a month I can go to as many movies as I like. So I’ve seen a lot of movies, I probably could do a Top 10 of the year or whatever. I won’t though. What I will say is that I’ve seen two movies this year that I know I will watch again and again.
500 days of Sumer is just my kinda movie. It is a non traditional love story where the boy doesn’t get the girl. I love that. Annie Hall, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and now this. Also it has a pretty cool soundtrack
Then there is A Serious Man. I only saw it yesterday so maybe my ‘gra’ for it is because it fresh in my mind. To be honest, I think its just because its brilliant. Its funny. It has pathos. It deals with physics and religion. It highlights a lot of life’s futilities and pointlessness. Its got some fantastic performances. It has immediately challenged Lebowski and Barton Fink as my favorite Cohen Brother movie.
7: Pueblo Ingles
In October, I spent 8 days on an English speaking programme in Spain. The idea was I volunteered my time to spend time with some Spanish people and the Spanish people could only speak English for that time. For 8 DAYS. Imagine spending that much time speaking a language that isn’t your first with a bunch of strangers, miles away from your family and friends. No phone, limited internet access and a real sense of WTF? (or the Spanish equivalent)
Despite the daunting nature of the course the people who I met there are some of the warmest, most open people that I have ever met. Spanish and Anglos (English speakers) alike.
To have the opportunity to meet and get to know people who I generally wouldn’t have had the chance to is truly one of the best moments of my life.
6: Music
I did movies so I guess I should do some music from the year too. I think my favourite of the year has to be Lungs by Florence and the Machine. It has a real sense of ‘ get up’ about it. I can’t imagine sitting passively listening to it. Its got some great tunes, she’s a bit bonkers (always a plus) and its hard to think of anything bad about it. I’m not a music critic, I just like this album.
5: Growing a Beard
My Beard is Awesome. Beards are Awesome. If you don’t have a beard (and are a man) then shame on you. BEARDS RULE!!!!
4: My Sister Had a Baby
His name is Sam. He’s very cute. My baby sister is all grown up. She’s 9 years younger than me, she is my only sister. She has a beautiful family and I’m very proud of her. I told her this. That’s not something that comes easy in our family. But I told her. And its something I’m really glad I did. I should say I was very drunk at the time. But she knew I meant it.
3: Books.
Books are another thing that is very important to me. I haven’t read as much as I’d like now that I’m driving. But the best book I read this year was an old one. Its called Miramar by an Egyptian writer called Naguib Mahfouz. It is set in a hostel in Egypt in the 1960’s. It looks at a series of events from the different perspectives of some of its inhabitants and how they revolve around a beautiful peasant girl.
It was borrowed from a friend who really recommended it. Find it and Read it.
Oh and the Watchmen graphic novel was much better than the movie
2: Reassessing What is important in Life
Maybe reassessing is the wrong word. For the most part I’m not sure I ever knew what was important in life. I think I have a better handle on it now.
I don’t need things. I don’t need 27 different t shirts. Books, cd’s and dvd’s have been a huge part in my life. But I don’t need them, I can get them cheaper online and don’t need the physical thing. I’ve a very basic TV and laptop. I don’t need the latest gadgets and gismos.
I can help people. I don’t necessarily have many qualifications or skills. But I can help others by just giving of my time. People will always need help. I’m going to try and be available as much as possible.
My family are important to me. I’ve always been very proud of my independence. I don’t visit my family often. I’m not particularly close to them. But they are my family and I realise now what they have done for me. They have played an enormous part of shaping me and for that I’m eternally grateful.
I want my own family. That’s what life is all about. We are here to procreate. I guess the first step to that is finding a partner. Leave it with me. I’ll get back to you in 2010.
1: Leaving Meteor.
I know I said it wasn’t in any particular order. But this is definitely number 1. That job was suffocating me as a person. I’m not saying it was the companies fault. But while I was there I didn’t allow myself to develop and I just stunted. Without doubt the best thing I ever did.
Its was just a job. But it defined me. And now, I will be the main factor in defining me.
I know there was some mystery surrounding why I left so quickly so let me unveil my secret. Let me use the pirate metaphor. Did I jump, or was I pushed. Well I jumped. Before I was pushed. However I did manage to grab on to some of the treasure so that I could live comfortably on the secret island for a bit.
Blimey that was a lot longer than I expected. I doubt anyone’s read it all. But if you did, here is another little bit
Other things I’ve enjoyed this year
The Sopranos - never saw it til this year. Possibly the greatest piece of artistic endeavour for the last 40-50 years
Veronica Mars- Never saw it til this year.
House - Never saw it til this year.
Taking Woodstock - Very enjoyable movie
Sweet Disposition by The Temper Trap. My favorite song of the last few months
Into the Wild - Only saw it this year
Gold Rapp in Tripod…or was that last year.
John and Lisa’s day of fun.
Working in Muji. Retail is fun.
Things I didn’t enjoy
Jedward
Lisa leaving Ireland
Football….raising my hopes and dashing them, constantly
Falling out with people (probably for the best but its not nice when its happening)
The Watchmen movie
So I’m kinda going into 2010 with a happy outlook on life and with no bad feeling towards anyone. I hope your doing the same????
Fair play to you.
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